Making The Right Choices | Personal Success | Success tips and life stories from Adam Khoo, Asia's top success coach.

Making The Right Choices

Sorry about the lag in posts. I’m in Indonesia and really busy (I know… it’s an excuse), so I hope this will give you some tremedous value.

I work in a line where my job is to help people and to empower them to achieve their goals and live their dreams in life. I enjoy what I do tremendously and I love my ‘work’. Self-empowerment simply means taking charge of your own life, you and only you decides what is right for you and where you want to go in the future, you make your own decisions and stick with them, not giving in to doubt or fear that you may have made the wrong choice. It is simply about taking your own life back into your own hands and listening to your inner self instead of relying on others for your future happiness and success.

Most of us rely on others to make decisions for us and we go along with them, this can be for many different reasons such as insecurity, low self-esteem or simply because it seems the easiest way to go. We do this in a variety of situations, some are as simple as choosing which movie to go and see and you follow along with your partner’s choice or where you want to go and eat. Taking your life back into your own hands and making your own choices is a simple as making healthy positive choices be they mental, emotional or physical. The following are all tips for making the right choices that enables you to become self-empowering.

We all have self-doubt at sometime or other, this is natural, but too many negative thoughts harm our way of thinking. Negative thinking however always seems to be so much easier to instil than positive, whether we care to believe it or not our feelings and how we feel or think does have a huge impact on our lives and what we think we are capable of achieving or not. We can so easily talk ourselves out of making decisions and choices if we listen to that small doubtful inner voice that so often shows up. It is those two little words that so often come to mind even without paying them much attention, “what if”, that cause so many problems. Once the “what if’s” have surfaced then self-doubt begins to take over every time and we can then go from a positive attitude to a negative one very quickly. Affirmations work well for changing negative thinking into positive thinking and affirmations are simply positive short statements that are repeated to oneself out loud or just in the mind. Write down four or five simple short statements and when self-doubt and the “what if’s” creep in consciously replace it with one of your chosen affirmations.

Realise that it is you and only you which puts these negative thoughts there, for example if you get stuck in a traffic jam then you can curse and work yourself up all you want but it wont change the fact that your stuck in a jam. Do not blame other drivers, the road works holding you up etc., take responsibility for the fact that you chose to drive that way, you set off at that particular time and instead of stressing yourself and those around you just let it go and focus on aspects that are more positive while you are stuck. Take this time to listen to that new CD you bought, read the report from your briefcase, practise affirmations or a stress reducing exercise, there are many more positive things you can do during this time than think negative.

Start with the little everyday choices that you are faced with, for example when asked what movie you want to go and see, stop and think and make a choice don’t just ask what your partner or friend would like to see. When asked which restaurant you would like to go to, give a decisive answer. Take control of your life in the small ways first and build up gradually until you are comfortable with this new way of thinking.

It will probably take a while for this new, more confident and positive way of thinking becomes easy, after all you have let negative thoughts and feelings rule your life for so long, they wont change overnight. By practising and pulling yourself up when negative thoughts and feelings enter your mind and doing this day in and day out slowly you will gain control back over your life and become more self-empowered.

Live your life and all the best!


6 Comments so far

  1. Javier Lee on July 2nd, 2007

    hi Adam..

    thank you for taking time off ur super duper busy schedule to write for us, the people on ur subscription list..

    And yes we all have the power of choice.. i always feel that even at times when we like to say:” haiya.. bo pian.. no choice.. where got choice??” we had already made a consious choice of saying that statement.. And we all know how the words we say affects our emotions, n how our behavior is driven not by rationale but by emotions. And of course our behaviors n actions dtermine our results!

    lastly adam, though i said it b4, i gotta say thank you to u again, for the opportunity u gave me coach n contribute when others just snubbed me even b4 they gave me any chance to train/coach for them…

    Thank you for doing what you do!


  2. Patrick Tan on July 2nd, 2007

    Thanks for the meaningful blog…

    Life’s all about choices , it’s what we choose to let our mind “eat”.
    It’s the same analogy when we feed our body with nutrition and healthy food.
    The more healthy thoughts that we feed to our brain will give us a strong and positive mind.

  3. Patrick Wong on July 2nd, 2007

    That’s a good way to keep yourself positive all the time. I know the theory that we must keep ourselves positive all the time, but when you are actually doing it, it’s very difficult. However, practise make perfect.


  4. Chin Ping on July 6th, 2007

    Hey Adam.Thank you for making the effort to dedicate time for blogging.Im sure many appreciate that.

    I realized that how we think and speak really affects what our actions really are.Now i take time to think and speak wisely before i really take action.Now,my close friends say they see the change in me.Guess coaching really gave me a wake up call about how i could be!

    Btw,hope that u can post some pictures from the camps so that i can DL it,yeah?thank you.and remember to support Earth Day,on 7th and 8th july by wearing green.Haha.

    Warmest regards,
    Chin Ping

  5. Conrad Romitman on August 21st, 2007

    Thanks, thats good! the big reason why human being give up is by thinking of they dn’t have any. “what you think what you are is what you are” always think positive the good way of life.

  6. mental coach on April 7th, 2008

    mental coach…

    Many people told me that the Internet has simplified staying in contact with business relations as a mental coach. Does this work for you?…

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